Dreams

It seems like the closer that I get to giving birth, the more I am involuntarily dreaming about death. Pretty morbid, right? In the past week, I have woken up several times in the middle of the night, sobbing and very perturbed, scaring the heck out of poor Chip. I wonder if every pregnant woman goes through this. Last night was my last episode; I have never had a nightmare that bad and that felt so real. I dreamt that I was apartment searching with an adorable little girl in my arms when suddenly we come to a big blue and white complex and I tell the person with me (whom didn't have an identity) "This is where Chip and I used to live" (which is strange because we have never lived in an apartment) to which that person replies "You are just going to have to let him go". Right then I understood that I was a widow and I was trying to find somewhere to live for my daughter and I. I started sobbing and this woke me up but I continued to cry just thinking about how horrific my life would be without him. Chip patiently rolls over to say "it's just a dream honey" (this time he didn't even have to ask what was wrong) and put his arm around me. I don't know what I would do without him. I feel so blessed to have met him and to be his wife and now to be starting our own family. He is such an amazing person whom I love and admire more each day. I am so grateful for the church and for knowing that he will always be with me.