Really-where does time go? Kamila will be turning one in just
two months. Our 3 year anniversary is in a little over a month. How I love that man that I met 4 years ago. He keeps me going, keeps me grounded and sane. He makes everything worthwhile and makes me feel like everything will be alright when things crumble around me. These past two months have been ultimately busy to put it lightly. Student teaching for this semester began mid-March and my sweet mother came to our rescue to watch Kamila as I was teaching from 7:30-3 and Chip working from 2:30 p.m. to midnight. Needless to say that without her I literally would have lost it. Actually, I think I kind of did. I'm sure I could have been nicer and of a brighter and warmer demeanor but stress and sleep deprivation does tend to get the best of me (not giving excuses). (Mama, si lees esto quiero que sepas cuanto te amo. Perdoname por no demostrartelo como deberia. Estoy aprendiendo a ser mas como tu. Te amo tanto.)
Just as field was coming to an end, my dear grandfather passed away Friday morning, March 26th. My mom, Kami and I immediately made plans to fly home the next morning. I am the kind of person who will constantly beat myself up over things I should have done or said. This situation was no exception. My heart was in pain, thinking about all the missed moments, missed phone calls, missed visiting opportunities that I didn't cherish or take the time to savor. I know that my grandfather is still my grandfather and that he is watching over me. I know that he knows how much I love him. I do not know how people who are not of my faith cope with death. I know that there is a plan, called the Plan of Happiness, that allows families to be together
forever. Without this knowledge, death really can be tragic. My grandfather died of brain and prostate cancer after a short, but painful battle. I was not able to say my "last" goodbye. I felt an impression to call him the night before his death but decided that I was not strong enough to hear an update on his health and trusted that there would be another chance to do so. That chance never came...because it was given to me and I didn't take it. As I saw his body lay before me, I felt him comfort me and tell me he loved me. I was able to recognize that that was just a body and that his spirit awaits our reunion just as much as I long for it.
This year has been nothing short of trials and heartbreak, but at the end of the day, I give thanks for the happiness and many, many blessings in my life. I am grateful to be part of the restored gospel that holds the only authority to seal families forever. I am grateful for the promises that I have made and been given in the temple. For those who are not familiar with my faith, you can click
here and
here for an explanation on temples and the Plan of Happiness. I am grateful to know that happiness is not "until death do you apart"... but that
happiness is forever.
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